space filler
brad - 10/16/17 - 5:27 am

I saw this quote on the Bookface and it rings true for me as well: "every episode of Rick & Morty is my favorite episode of Rick & Morty". It's on par with Always Sunny, there is not a single bad episode in the bunch. Season 3 of R&M ended at the beginning of the month, but I didn't watch the final four episodes of the season until this past week. The wait between the 1st and 2nd season was 15 months, and 18 months between the 2nd and 3rd season. So it may be awhile if and when a 4th season comes out, but I'm perfectly fine with waiting if it's going to be just as good as every episode so far.

Michigan football: 5-1, had to win in OT to beat Indiana. Dropped two places in the AP Poll to #19. It's going to be an ugly game at #2 Penn State on Saturday, in prime time no less.

Virginia Tech football: 5-1, bye week. Moved up one place in the AP Poll to #14. At home to a 1-6 UNC team on Saturday, so everything adds up to watching VT struggle to get a win this coming weekend.

Red Wings hockey: 4-1, tied for 1st in the Atlantic Division. Mike Green leads the team with 8 points, which is a sure sign the apocalypse is coming, so prepare for that.

Devils hockey: 4-1, tied for 1st in the Metro Division. Rookie Will Butcher leads the team with 8 points, in the same way Green leads the Wings, all assists.

Iceland MNT: qualified for World Cup 2018 with a 2-0 win over Kosovo. They are the smallest country to qualify for the World Cup, with a population of 330,000.

US MNT: with at least a 90% chance to qualify on the last match day in CONCACAF qualifying, failed. They lost to Trinidad & Tobago 2-1. The only scenario where they would advance with a loss is if both Panama and Honduras lost as well, which neither did. Both of those countries pulled off wins against Costa Rica and Mexico respectively, and secured the points they needed to move on. The last time the US missed the World Cup was 1986.

Lions football: 3-3, lost to the Saints 52-38. They play the Browns on 11/12. $100 says the Browns get their first win of the season on the road at Detroit.

I did nothing but nap this weekend. I floated in and out of consciousness during the Michigan game. I took a nap halfway through the rest of the other afternoon games. I took another nap late Saturday night. I woke up Sunday just before 1 pm to double check my fantasy football roster, then went back to bed for another couple hours. Woke up for a bit then took another nap before dinner. I almost napped too long on Wednesday, I woke up just in time to drive out to my 9:30 pm game that night. The previous weekend was chock-full of naps as well.

I have averaged over 7 1/2 hours of sleep per night over the past four weeks, according to the numbers I put into my Fitbit tracking. It's misleading, because I record the time I get into bed, not the time when I fall asleep, because that's impossible to obtain. It seems to take me an hour or more every night before I finally conk out. Recently, it's been harder to ignore my tinnitus while I'm trying to fall asleep. I don't think that it's been getting louder, but it's definitely been more noticeable for some reason. I'm really only comfortable when I am on my side, so I have one ear exposed to the fans I have running in my room, and one buried in my pillow. So I end up restless, going back and forth from side to side, until I've tired myself out, or I keep thinking about stuff until I've drawn enough attention away from the tinnitus to finally fall asleep. I don't know if this is going to be temporary or the norm from here on out.

Work is super boring. Très boring. I know that I probably won't be doing anything remotely interesting until the beginning of February. I loathe going into work right now, and I'd only be slightly less bored if I could work from home every single day. Again, it's not like there isn't anything to do, but none of those things are pressing issues and it's been extremely difficult as of late to convince myself to "get after 'em".

I'm bored. That's where I'm at. I'm bored with my life. I don't want to admit it. If I say I'm bored, the first thought that immediately comes to mind is "If you're bored, I'll give you something to do." Nope, don't want that either. I've prided myself on not being bored. I've squirreled tons of things away to do in the event that I hit a stretch where I find myself restless an in need of a distraction. It turns out that I don't want to do any of those things either.

The issue with soccer is my lack of desire. Even during the spring season when I hated the majority of it, I was still impassioned with my anger and resentment towards the situation. It sucked, but part of me still wanted to care. I don't feel any of that anymore. I simply don't care at all. I still show up and put in a decent effort, but my desire to compete is severely lacking. Every week that passes, I am more content with a decision to quit soccer altogether at the end of the season.

Weight loss is still happening, but at a slower pace. It's an addiction to sugar that has a hold of me again. I'm back to drinking pop more often than I should. I can't seem to pass up the cookies that are provided at work like I used to. Sugar has a hold of me again and it's slowing my progress. Eating out is way up for the month, while treadmill use is way down. At the very least, I'm still putting in a minimal amount of effort to continue working towards my goal. The good news is that the effort is greater than zero, but the bad news is that it's not nearly what it was a month ago.

I'm kind of stuck right now. I lack motivation. I can't bring myself to do more than the bare minimum required to survive on a daily basis. My interest levels in anything and everything are dwindling. I don't know where it all went, or why it went away. I don't know what to do to get it back. Something has opened a jar of malaise and is slowly pouring it all over my life. I'm not feeling unhappiness, but I'm not caring nearly as much as I should.

I still can't spell noticeable correctly. Thanks, spell check.

I was going to skip posting this week, but I started writing just to see what would come out. What you see is the result of that. It's probably similar to the past handful of posts I've made. I should probably take a break.



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